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As a blogger it’s easy to get caught up, to look around, and compare yourself to others in the game. Whether it’s followers and engagement on Instagram, the latest product someone else is offering, or feeling caught up in a rat race of catching up, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed or super behind just by glancing on a feed. I must be honest in saying that I’ve been there. I see the articles that pop up on my feeds, “How I Got 30K in the first three months” or “How I made 6-figures in my first year of blogging,” and think I must be doing something absolutely wrong.
With comparison, the questions can become endless. For me, it starts out simple and innocent enough. I scroll through my feeds and find inspiration in the content that fills my screen. I take a screenshot and place it in an inspiration file. Later on I find myself referring to my inspiration folder and then the fillings begin to rise. Thoughts of how I could shoot things differently, how I need to schedule posts, how I should blog more inspirational/viral content, needing to return to the gym, or add more makeup for a stronger style post. I see the sponsored posts and thinking this little labor of love while fun, isn’t all it shouldn’t be, because well my numbers aren’t there. Here’s the thing about comparison. We compare our real life to someone’s highlight reel of content or see their launch and not all the work that goes into their feeds.
So how do you kill comparison? What are practical steps to avoid overwhelm, rediscover the joy of creating, and not feeling the need to top your personal best as a creative?
Over the years, I’ve found a few tips that are vital to killing comparison (as a girlboss) and here are a few of my favorites.
For me this dialogue happens through prayer. I have moments of quiet and solace throughout my day. I look to the eyes of love and remind myself that I am enough, that I am loved with every moment of my imperfections, due to amazing grace. I keep on telling myself that “I am enough” until I believe it. Here’s the funny thing about it. It’s really easy to forget.
Have you ever find yourself coming home from a long day exhausted and spent? Much like operating on auto-pilot, you plop on the couch and turn on the TV. Then no longer fully focused on a show, you open your laptop, and begin scrolling through feeds. A few minutes later, you pop out your phone looking at the Instagram posts you might have missed throughout the day. Instead of decompressing and resting, it’s easy to fill your mind with endless streams of content. Intentionally gauge the time you spend on social media. Honestly engage (more than a liked post) or contribute to the platform. But stop the mindless scroll and embrace rest.
There are times where you just need to disconnect from a screen. There are some professions that value rest and a sabbatical. For others, we call it vacation. Take time to schedule times where you are outside in nature and on an adventure, no longer worrying about ways to capture your outing for the world, but instead experiencing. For those folks who love to get ahold of you at all times, simply state, “I’m so sorry I was out of service.” It works every time.
There are phenomenal girl bosses to look up to out there. But here’s the truth, you can’t do it all. Adopting someone else’s method or prescribed recipe for engagement, likes, traffic, etc, may not be your thing. Ask yourself why you’re creating what you’re creating. If you’re solely writing and creating content for engagement or profit, something has lost it’s creative heartbeat along the way. Grant yourself space to ask questions and bounce it off of other creatives and entrepreneurs along the way. Rediscover the joy of sustainable creation even if it means a hiatus for a bit.
I don’t keep catalogs in my house and have unsubscribed to the majority of the email lists I once was on. Why? I simply don’t want to engage in content that makes me question my contentment. My life won’t be better once I have more stuff, a better outfit, or the next thing. Choose contentment, happiness, and optimism now. It truly is a choice.
How have you killed comparison? We’d love to hear from you.